I wanted to take a breather from my infertility journey to discuss another topic, I will get back to infertility soon enough as there is a lot to tell. As I had a few minutes to reflect this weekend I wanted to discuss something that is on my mind, and I have a feeling some of you may be experiencing this as well. As I was about to settle into a three day weekend with my family, it always takes a little while for me to disconnect and unwind. I always find this push and pull of wanting to be present for my kids, but this drive to provide and to work, it is a hybrid of the two and can be very unsettling. Are any other Mamas experiencing this?
My inner voice is telling me to slow down, breathe, look at what is in front of you, watch (my twins) play with each other or eat their lunch or just simply smile. Or watch my older 4 yr old son exploring the world, listening to his words and really think about what he is trying to reason and figure out in his mind. As I am watching all of this, I can't help but think about those emails that need to be sent out, and how am I going to pay for camp this summer if I just slow down or college someday. The work doesn't stop, but can we stop it? Is there a way to cut the anxiety out, and put it on pause. This is the real life struggle, and I wonder is there really a perfect answer to this? And if so how do we get there. Maybe it is just about having the faith that it will all work out, in order to find that inner peace.
I started to write down all the things that would help me slow down to keep in it perspective, sometimes it is just a frame of mind we need to get to. Here are some tips that helped me get there.
1)Doing less, I know this is easier said than done as the calendar is jam packed. But we choose what is on the calendar and maybe we need to say some more No's for our sanity. It is so liberating to make this choice and choose what is best for your family.
2)Be Present- Being in each moment, there with my kids, watching it all and soaking it up. And putting that phone out of reach. It reminds you that nothing else is more important than this.
3)Appreciate Nature- This is a big one for me, just listening to the birds or feeling a breeze or listening to the ocean can be a reminder that sometimes we need to stop and just smell the roses.
I think it is truly about having a whole lot of faith. The work is always going to be there, but these years of our kids being little won't. These early years of making memories and building family traditions won't. And life just passes us by if we don't stop to smell the roses and soak up those sweet smiles and laughter. This is our time, right now to just be present so I have decided I am going to block out the work when I need to and know that I am making the best choice. Let's see how this all plays out, stay tuned.